Wanderings – The worrier…

The other day, my wife Isabell pointed out that it’s only 100 days until Christmas. Normally I would retort with a quote from Ebenezer Scrooge and then opine that talking about the holiday in September is too soon. Instead I think I replied with an “oh that’s nice” and I became distracted for a few minutes thinking about the holiday. That was a nice distraction for a change.

Distracted is a good word to describe me this year; worried is the other.

Nearly every person I have talked to is worried right now. This year has not turned out the way I expected it to. I like to believe no one would have asked for 2020 to turn out like this, unless their name is Michael Crichton or Tom Clancy.

I worry a lot, I always have. It’s one of those personality traits of mine I could really do without.

Some people donâ’t get worried about many things, I envy those people. But even the people who never seem to worry are worried. That worries me too. Things must be bad if those people are worrying.

Covering the news in a pandemic doesn’t help. When your news beat includes covering who’s sick, or worse, doesn’t help. Neither does having school-aged kids in school right now; or kids who have moved away for post-secondary education.

Back to school wasnâ’t the “most wonderful time of the year” this year, as the Staples commercials profess. The decision of sending kids back to school was tough to make. Online or in-class? Synchronous or asynchronous? There is no wrong or right in this decision. I wish administrators would stop using fancy words though and just call a spade a spade. At least some kids get to start class this month, maybe.

Distractions are a good thing for me. I’m already easily distracted, and since I am limited to one cup of coffee per day, I need all the distractions I can get.

Sports help a bit. I wouldn’t have thought the Stanley Cup playoffs would be in September; nor would I have though two southern US teams would be in the finals. Usually it’s just Leaf fans who plan Cup parades in September. I am afraid that sports only go so far for distractions though. Soccer is back, but not locally; I missed the season here.

I’m an avid reader, or at least I was at the start of the year. I haven’t read a novel since March. Binge watching old TV shows has been distracting. But there is only so much of The Office one can watch. I am on episode 199 and there are only 201 episodes. What next?

Worrying doesn’t mean I suffer from “analysis paralysis”, where one doesn’t do anything out of fear or lack of information. I do stuff, just not as much as my wife might like when it comes to the project list around the house.

I haven’t turned into one of those pandemic people that managed to lose 30 pounds, run daily, and eat Kale. Maybe I should have? (Except for Kale, yuck!)

Instead I eat my feelings, which is good for dealing with all the baked goods everyone has had time to rediscover making. Food is a vice right?

I would like for there to be one day of not worrying. For the ever climbing tallies to disappear. One day without fear of the school calling that your child is sick. Or that an allergy attack isn’t actually COVID-19. Just one day absent of worrying would be nice. A break. That and my hockey team winning the Stanley Cup. Right now, I don’t know which will come first.